Being A Leader Course, Day 7

Is it already day seven? Yes, and I’ve promised to be writing what happened in the course every day, and I didn’t do that. So today I’m going to continue from day 7, which is the current day, and maybe come back to the previous days if I have time to.

The days are really packed. During the course days, I meet with my group before the course starts, usually at 7:30am. We finish after 7pm and all breaks consist of assignments. I know it may seem like it’s too much, but the days pass way too quickly.

Suddenly, the conversation about integrity wakes me up. Integrity, as being whole and complete, is a matter of honouring one’s word – in a nutshell, that means doing things that you’d say you do and doing them on time, doing what you know to do, what you say, what you stand for, doing what others expect you to do.

I could talk about integrity for hours and there’s so much more to it, but where I got struck was when one of the instructors said: the most important aspect of being out of integrity is the loss of yourself and this is often mistaken for the loss of  self-confidence. Now I’m fully awoken. And I start to think where I’m out of integrity most of the time. I don’t have to look for too long: it’s my diet and exercising.

Some of you may know my diet is very restrictive due to an autoimmune disease. Simply put, there are many foods I can’t have or shouldn’t have as long as I want to keep my body healthy and functioning. The problem is I keep fooling myself that I keep the diet while I don’t. Same with exercise. I love it. I know it’s great for me and for my health too. Yet I don’t do it.

Why that happens is because when my word is not complete, I am diminished as a person. And self-disintegration reduces my opportunity for performance and ability to realise what is possible for me to be. When I got present to this, I realised how much it’s costing me. I’m literally hurting my body and I don’t function as good as I could – then of course I’m more tired and that gets in the way of producing results at work and in any other area of my life.

And I’m really happy I saw that today. I instantly opted for the right food choices today and not only my stomach feels better, but I’m feeling peaceful. On top of that, I’m already planning to sign up to a gym they opened just a few weeks ago just 5 minutes from home. I’m excited – this is going to be awesome!

Another discussion we had today was a conversation about authentic listening. What is authentic listening? Well, let’s look first what it’s not. If you’ve ever experienced people repeating to you the same thing over and over and over again, consider that you were not really listening to them.

I’ve had some experience with this exercise before from other courses. Few months ago I has a customer coming to my course totally upset, almost shouting at me, telling me she would leave me a bad review because she “couldn’t find the place”. Yet when I listened, I made her concern disappear. Finally, she left the course thanking me for meeting me, and she said the course answered all the questions she had about blogging. It was a unique experience that only authentic listening creates and it’s truly awesome. Just try it for yourself.

In the last conversation on day seven, we looked at our understanding of the Future. The future is given to us by our survival instincts. That is, “the brain, below the level of consciousness, only has patterns from the past from which to predict the future”. I know for myself I have some that are in my way to produce results. These may include thoughts such as, “I will never make a lot of money for me and my family”. Or “I still don’t know a lot about writing (therefore I shouldn’t try to publish a book)”. But then I imagine for a moment – what would that be like to be without these constraints?

I dwelled more into that questions later when I met with Mark for drinks – I was lucky to find him on the course as I was looking for someone to talk about online marketing. I realised how much my “I don’t know” is in the way of stepping up and creating something bigger than myself. Yet I know what to do! That’s the most brilliant part – I know exactly what to do. I already know that my courses are valuable. I already know they work. And I know that it’s time to leverage them for a committed audience I want to work with.

Not only that, one o my group

Today I’m falling asleep with the new picture of my life. It’s the life that works for me and the one I love. One in which I get up to go to gym and then dress up to produce outstanding results. Results that are valuable and make a difference for my business, writing, and everyone around me who I love or don’t even know.

As Mark pointed out, maybe I should re-consider how big my game is. How about a book reading in San Francisco? I got an invitation to do it today – could that be real? As I’m sitting in Abu Dhabi, in the middle of a desert where I see acres of green grass, something tells me that it’s possible.


Read the whole diary of Being A Leader course:

Being A Leader Course, Day 1
Being A Leader Course, Day 2
Being A Leader Course, Day 3
(Day 4, 5, 6 are missing)
Being A Leader Course, Day 7
Being A Leader Course, Day 8
Being A Leader Course, Day 9, 10 & Two Weeks Later